History! 5/26

Its been quite a while since the last time I did History! at all you poor people. As such, because I'll be dealing with courtrooms and bailiffs for the remainder of the day and into the night I thought it best to do one early so it didn't seem wasted. So, lets get on with it then shall we?

1293 AD, In Kamakura Japan an earthquake struck. Now this happens a lot, like all the time, however what made this one so special is that it killed 30,000 people! Seriously, the Japanese at he time were living in single story shacks, so the likelihood of them being completely unable to flee outside is slightly incredible. Thus I am forced to to picture the ground literally opening up and swallowing a whole city. When I did a quick google search for 'Japanese Earthquake" this is on the first page! My guess is that the Japanese have a long standing tradition of rescue cats, dating back to this terrible disaster, when bands of cats would roam the rubble looking for survivors and demanding treats until rescuers could arrive.
.


1538, Man, John Calvin, founder of Calvinism is just cold hated by everybody. On this day he was kicked out of Geneva and told to go cause dissent someplace else. Naturally he picked Strasbourg, because when I think of places to hide from the Catholic church I think of Strasbourg.

1637, Here is a big one for me, like epic! During the Pequot War in North America, noted douche bag John Mason, Bostonian General of a combined force of puritans and Mohegans attacked the seat of Pequot power in Connecticut. The Pequot had earned the ire of the local puritans and through some shady back room deal the puritans had gotten the Narragansett and Mohegan tribes to assist in a brutal war against the larger Pequot tribe. Well, Mason and the puritans were eager to attack the chief of the Pequot, but after a long days marching they opted instead to attack a nearby Pequot fort. This was also after encouragement from the Mohegans, under their equally douchey chief Uncas, who had found some Pequot on the way and decapitated them, showing the heads to Mason. So today Mason surrounds the fort in the dead of night, with his Mohegan and Narragansett allies (the Narragansett weren't all that bad actually, they were like a Native American Andorra, just cold stuck in the middle of all the big guys) and orders volleys to bie fired into the fort. At this point the Pequot awake and start moaning and shouting so pitifully that the English think for a moment that perhaps they should take pity on their opponants. At this point it is noted that they overcame their Christian charity when they remembered that the Pequot had cruelly slain a dude months before on his houseboat. Oh yeah, that dude that the Pequot killed, that kinda caused this war, he was a wife stealing, smuggler/pirate who had been asked to leave the puritans cities because he was a nuisance, but puritans have extremely short memories and extremely long grudges. Mason orders the group of puritans and indians to enter the fort and fight hand to hand, which then forces him to reconsider and instead he declares boldly, "We must burn them!" So Mason promptly lights a torch and sets a bark house on fire, to the complete shock of the Pequot. The fire is picked up by the wond and the whole fort is completely ablaze within thirty minutes. Now the English (who have suffered two casualties during this) block the two exits and proceed to keep the burning Pequot in the fort, stabbing or shooting anyone who came near, including women and children. Within an hour of the initial fighting close to 700 Pequot are dead. The Mohegan and Narragansett look at each other in complete horror at what they were party to, especially the usually chill Narragansett who had emphatically stated at the beginning that should any forts be captured that the women and children must be spared. As for the puritans, you know, the buckle shoe wearing thanksgiving fuckers, here is how they used the bible to explain why they had to burn every mother fucker in sight, including the women kids and babies.

"Should not Christians have more mercy and compassion? No. When a people is grown to such a height of blood and sin against God and man...there He hath no respect to persons, but harrows them and saws them and puts them to the sword and the most terriblest death that may be." as for the kids? The answer being totally! "Sometimes, the scripture declareth women and children must perish with their parents. We had sufficient light from the word of God for our proceedings."

That one siege effectively marked the end of Pequot resistance. Now long after the Mystic Fort Massacre as it is called a statue was erected on the site of John Mason drawing his sword. Thank heavens there were still some Pequot descendants who pointed out that putting up the statue was the equivalent of putting up a "monument at Auschwitz to Heinrich Himmler, architect of the Nazis' Final Solution." Thus the statue was moved to another site, though it was still met with protests for the fact that the man was hardly a hero. If you would like to know more about how terrible, and sometimes terribly humane the puritans were I recommend Sarah Vowell's 'The Wordy Shipmates'.

1647, ten years after the last blood letting, though the intervening years had plenty of blood shed, the puritans execute their first witch in the New World, Alse Young. Seriously guys, stop it.

1805, Napoleon is crowned king of Italy. You know what, I want to build a huge army, more advanced and better supplied than any other army in history and start conquering places, so I can declare myself 'King' of them. "Have you heard, General Trebaol has conquered the Starbucks on Main st. He is holding a coronation and will be declared 'King of Starbucks and Coffee'."

1830, man this is a bad day for Native Americans. So today the Indian Removal Act is passed by Congress and two days from now Andrew "Trail of Tears" Jackson signs it into law.


1868, Andrew Johnson narrowly misses getting impeached by a single vote. The reasons are a little complicated and extremely boring.

1894, Nicholas II becomes the Tzar of All Russia's! Did I neglect to point out he will also be the Last Tzar of All Russia's!

1938, The House Un-American Activities Committee has its first meeting, however they really don't become extremely interesting till the fifties so lets leave them there for now.

1940, The battle of Dunkirk! Or rather the important part of the battle, you know the part where against every possible expectation the British manage ti escape the huge Nazi war machine barreling towards them. Literally fishing boats crossed the channel so they could pick up five guys and take them back to England, while being shelled by 'Jerry'.

1983, a frikkin' 7.7 earthquake strikes Japan, but this time the method of execution is tsunami! 103 people are killed by the mammoth fuckin' wave. screw you plate tectonics!

So there is fuckin' that! History for May 26th!

History! April 24th + Time and Space

Well at least one thing that happened in the past was interesting today. however here's something that has always intrigued me, time and space. You see I love history, and the thought that at a point in time in a certain place something happened where real living people, with lives and plans met and something happened. Naturally then I have an interest in the idea of traveling through time. Now then, that's slightly complicated when I think about it, and it's something I've never really noticed explained or considered in time travel fiction, that thing being your 'place' in time. You see the Earth isn't just spinning around the Sun in space, the whole solar system is also moving and spinning, so where we are now is not where we were a thousand years ago, dig? This creates for me a concern, if you drop me off at a vector in space, at a point in time, wont I be dropped off gasping in the void, even if the Earth is relatively close by even an error of a few miles or minutes could kill me in horrible ways. So then, if you have heard someone speak about this issue please raise your hand, I would love to know the solution.

So, lets get back to the point, History!

1184, the Greeks use the Trojan horse to enter the city of Troy, where they go batshit insane and kill everyone, 'cuz that's how the Greeks roll.

Go get 'em lads.

1558, Mary Queen of Scots marries the Dauphin of France at Notre Dame, afterwards she pleasantly remarks "Man, could life get any better? There is no way I'm getting decapitated the way things are going."

1800 the Library of Congress is founded, John Adams told congress he needed 5,000 dollars to buy all the books Congress could potentially need. After that initial investment was burned in the War of 1812 Thomas Jefferson supplied the replacements, because he pretty much owned every book in North America, not that he found time to read between writing pamphlets and being a dick to his slaves. Now the Library of Congress has millions of books, all at the disposal of our legislative body, in case they need them to understand government, for example I'm certain the epic political tome "Are You There God, It's Me Margaret" is a favorite amongst representatives.

Dashed bad luck that.

1898, Aww shit, President McKinley gets his wish and America declares war on Spain. So today marks the beginning of the Spanish American War, this being like the fourth completely unnecessary American war, right after the War of 1812, the Mexican/American War (However I do like living in California, thank you Polk), the Indian Wars, and of course now this shit. McKinley wanted an excuse to flex Americas muscles and show the world it was hot shit and that everyone needed to be nervous. At the same time Teddy Roosevelt (a rival and major nuisance to McKinley) was all hot and bothered by the prospect of a war that he could be in. So we marched off and beat the ever loving snot out of Spain, a country that hadn't had a good day since the Armada got blown of course in the 17th century. Roosevelt incidentally beat so much ass that America fell in love with him, and to keep him from getting his hands into government McKinley offered him the vice presidency when he ran for re-election. This was of course a brilliant stroke, because vice presidents can't do dick, and they usually fade from the spotlight as a result, that is until you get assassinated by Leon Czolgosz (pronounced Sholgosh).

Oh look at them laugh.

1915, we see the beginning of the Armenian Genocide, which according to earlier ads from Turkey on my home page, never happened. Yeah right Turkey, like I believe you at all.

1916, the Easter uprising begins, wherein Patrick Pearse, James Connolly, and Joseph Plunkett all start gettin' up in the faces of the hated British in Ireland. I recommend you all now go and listen to as many Irish nationalist tunes as you can find.

1918, in the now dwindling World War I we see the first tank to tank combat of the war, when three British Mark IV's ran into three German A7V's...the fight was probably really confusing and boring, here's the contestants...

That just screams Britain doesn't it, like a big 'ole pot of stew, in a pub with a bulldog squattin' in a corner licking his unmentionables.

Well, isn't that just so...efficient? No wonder you lost the war, you built toaster ovens instead of tanks.

1926, the Treaty of Berlin is signed, it says that Germany and Russia wont go to war for five years if a third party starts shit, you know, if the cause of World War I happens all over again, 'cuz everyone just stone jonesin' for a fight. Never mind that the thing you should be really worried about is the crippling economic conditions or the annoying guy shaking his fists and screaming about Jews.

1953, Winston Churchill is knighted by the Queen. Really, not you know, after the war, like the week it ended...'53? What was it even for the war, or did you just give him the knighthood because he gave you a really cool record player as a birthday present. I mean Christ, he's so fuckin' British he owns that pub with the bulldog licking itself. He calls it the Freckled Dick, the pub, not the dog.

1967, Cosmonaut Vladimir Komarov dies on the Soyuz 1 when his parachute doesn't open. This is the first human to die on a space mission. America, insulted that they lost this particular honor in the space race promptly kills all the astronauts in the Apollo 1, with fire, because that's more brutal than just falling to your death, when there's so much pure oxygen in your spaceship that a static shock will blow your ass to kingdom come. Way to go, America number 1.

2005, we got our new shitty Pope, you know the one who looks like Emperor Palpatine.

Feel the power of this fully armed and operational Vatican.

History! April 16!

So today we have more history, and a guaranteed visit from a Kate Beaton strip. So if you don't like Kate Beaton, you'd better get the fuck outta the way.



73 AD, Masada falls to the Romans. You may know Masada, it was a Jewish stronghold during the Jewish Revolt in the Holy Land. The reason you may know Masada is that the history channel carts it's antiquated ass out all the time show the amazing skills the Romans had for sieges. Also, in case you were wondering, the Romans won.



1746, the battle of Culloden is fought between the Scottish Jacobite Rebels and the holier than though British. the Scots had been toiling under Hanoverian British rule for some time now and were rather hoping to restore one of their Stuart monarchs to the throne. So one of the rightful heirs to the Scottish/English throne was Charles Stuart, known to his friends as Bonnie Prince Charlie, or 'The Young Pretender', not to be confused with his father 'The Old Pretender', or the Freddy Mercury cover of 'The Great Pretender'.



Charlie raised an army of Scottish rebels (called Jacobites) and defeated the British Army in Scotland, failing however in the long run to defeat the garrison in Edinburgh. Mind you many Scottish people at the time weren't particularly enthused by the prospect of another rebellion, they had had quite a few and they usually ended with everyone dead. So to assuage the fears (most people steal Shakespeare quotes, I steal Lincoln) of the rebel army and the locals Charlie explains that "We are going to get help! Yes, tonnes of help from the British Jacobites, what you've never heard of them, well...they're a silent majority in England and with this excellent news that I won they will rise up! Oh, and also the French will invade! They have nothing better to do right?" So the army marches along happily waiting for a force of French troops to come briskly to England and start kicking ass, never mind the whole "ENGLAND RULES THE WAVES" thing. Well Charlie marched South and moved ever closer to London and King George II, but trouble was comin' for him. Charles was informed that the French invasion fleet was still being organized, that the garrison in London outnumbered him by 1,000, plus cavalry, and that there were two separate armies headed his way, one led by George's son, the Duke of Cumberland and another led by George Wade. There were also spurious rumours that another army was flanking them, but this was fiction. Oh yeah, and those awesome English Jacobites, they never came forward, but more highlanders were beginning to mass in Scotland to join up when he returned.



Charlie decided then (with deep resentment, because he's an idiot) to hand over command to Lord George Murray, who says "Let's go home and see if we can actually win this rebellion." Well the Army headed north and kept getting harassed by British troops, as well as lack of footwear (all that marching really wears holes in your shoes made of paper). Cumberland arrives in Edinburgh and tells everyone "Listen up, I'm in charge up here, so we're going to head to Aberdeen and train, then go and kill us some wild Scots." After the cheering died down they went and did this. Charlie, being the prick he is, demanded that the army be placed back under his control, he wanted to fight a defensive action against Cumberland.



So lets look at the two armies shall we? First off we have the Jacobites, an army comprised of Scottish clans. these clan based regiments bore the name of their originating family, and were led by officers from that clan, while the soldiers were all people who were tenants of the clans land. Generally to get the men to fight you had to be at the front of the ranks, which naturally meant an enormously high mortality rate for officers in the Jacobite army, so I suppose leadership was one of their biggest problems.



On the other side we have the British Army, a well trained constantly mobile, brutally efficient fighting force. I mean Christ, for most of the campaign the Scots had pitchforks and axes instead of guns.



Onto the battle! So Today in History Charles decides that it's best to organize his men in a flat marshy area near Culloden. The one tactic that made the Scots dangerous was their feared 'Highland Charge' which primarily involved enormous bearded men running at break neck speed down a hill with swords until either they were dead, or the other guy was. So fighting on pock marked flat terrain was the antithesis of what a person in charge of 7,000 Scots would want to do. The council of war asked Charles to 'please reconsider, we could fight a guerrilla campaign' to which Charles flatly refused 'No bitches, this Cumberland be all up in my shit!'



So how did the battle go? Well the British stood around with long range guns and picked off highlanders, until of course Charlie demanded a charge. So now the already beleaguered Scots moved towards the murderous fire, until finally bloody and beaten they retreated. So in total some 2,000 Scots were killed in the fighting and retreat, oh, and Charlie, he fled the battle quick as a bunny and made his way East towards Skye. The British lost 50 men, bummer for the Highlands.



Charles made good his escape from Scotland and returned to France deciding it was against his best interest to ever come back. Meanwhile the now totally pissed off British proceeded to put the screws to the Highlands, raiding family residences and searching for signs of rebels. it was straight up Star Wars in Scotland after that, except I guess Luke goes back to Tatooine in this one. Now here's your comic...


Alright lets carry on then, oh and visit harkavagrant.com




1917, Lenin rolls on into Petrograd after his exile in Switzerland, looks like shits about to hit the fan in Russia!




1943 Dr. Albert Hofmann discovers that LSD makes you turn into a Ralph Steadman painting.




1947, the term "Cold War" is coined, and thank heavens, the runner up was "A War Where Neither of Us Shoots Because We're Afraid of Causing An Apocalypse".




1990, Dr. Kevorkian does his first assisted suicide, fun times.

History! March 13 2009!

Lets peer through the muted shades of time and find the events most interesting to have occurred since recorded time.

On this day in 1138 Gregoria Conti is elected Antipope. The antipopes are not to be confused with the song "I Am The Antipope" by Zlad! Antipopes originated in the fact that the Catholic Church didn't always do things in lockstep and every once in a while a Bishop would become Pope and the rest of the Cardinals and Kingdoms who cared would say "Whoah bitch! You'd better back up off my transubstantiation!" These indignant catholics would select a better leader, labeled an antipope. Gregorio led an interesting life as Antipope, however the details of this life are only interesting to people who really care about squabbling in the 14th century Catholic church, that is to say almost no one.

William Herschel discovered Uranus in 1781, his plan to draw the name from a hat backfires terribly after he refuses to accept the previously drawn names "Urectum" and "Urgay".

In 1862 Union commanders are ordered to not return any fugitive slaves, effectively negating the fugitive slave act of 1850. This will be followed by the Emancipation Proclamation in 1863.

Oh lordy! In 1884 the siege of Khartoum begins. Britain had been mucking around the world for ages by the time the famed General Charles George Gordon was sent to the Sudan. Egypt had been battling insurrectionists in the country for years and an evacuation had been ordered, the plans for this were spearheaded by the British General Gordon (Egypt being a near colony of England at the time). Gordon was the most colorful General in Her Majesty's employ at the time, going by names such as Chinese Gordon, Gordon Pasha and eventually Gordon of Khartoum. He had acquired these nicknames by virtue of the fact that when he arrived in a new country he automatically adopted the manner of dress of the locals, "going native" as it were. In the Sudan Britain and Egypt had been experiencing troubles with a local leader called The Mahdi. The Mahdi was in open revolt against the Egyptian authority in the Sudan and wished to spread Islam to all corners of the globe. Technically speaking "the Mahdi" is a term in Islam to describe a chosen one who is prophesied to arrive at the end times. Anyway, Gordon is ordered to evacuate and leave Sudan to the Sudanese, but decides that doing so would mean that there would be a spot on the map that wasn't under direct British supervision. so to force the hand of government in London he remained in Khartoum waiting to battle the Mahdi when he arrived. London went batshit. "Who the fuck does Gordon think he is, he knows the public loves him, and he knows how shitty this will get if he stays and we're forced to show up and hand people their asses. Fuck you Gordon!" Was most likely the conversation Prime Minister Gladstone had when he heard the news. So on this day in history, Gordon closed the doors, distributed the guns and waited patiently for the Mahdi to blow him the fuck up or the British army to crest the nearest hill and kill everyone with maxim guns. Oh yeah, you probably want to know what happened next...Gordon gets decapitated on the steps to his office, the Mahdi gets killed too, but a little while later when the British (surprise surprise) show up late. The Mahdi's one world Islamic revolution falls apart, most likely because he's dead for most of it.

1900 sees the capture of a town by the British in the Second Boer War. this is a war in which we see the British battling Dutch farmers for control of South Africa. Britain built the first concentration camps for this conflict to house all the conquered farmers in blistering heat without food. You might also remember (probably not) that the First Boer War (previously the Boer War) was the engagement that featured fictional Doctor James Watson.

1921 Jesus. Mongolia declares its independence from China. You think you know Mongolia? You think its just yaks and plains? Fuck no, Mongolia is one of those places that creates fuckers like this! Baron Roman Nickolai Maximilian von Ungern-Sternberg, go to wikipedia and look at his fucking picture, no wait I'll put it here...

What the fuck, you know this guys nickname, the Bloody Baron, you know why? Because anyone who looks at this picture and doesn't just kinda feel that name in the back of their head is just as crazy as he is. He is some of the crazy detritus that got launched from the wounds of the Russian Revolution. He wanted to restore the Romanovs as well as the Mongolian monarchy, however for lack of adequate living descendants of either he decided to exterminate Jews and Communists instead. Seriously, why is it when your crazy and born before 1950 the only answer to a question of leadership is "Do I kill Jews or communists today?"

"What are we going to do about the grain shortages Baron Unger-BloodTrough?"

"Hurm...we must eliminate the Jews and their intellectual allies."

"Okay."

Anyway this clown was crazy, crazy like real clowns are crazy, he would intentionally mispronounce his name because it sounded and I quote "to jewy". He loved nomadic peoples and fought in World War 1 where he was considered brave but slightly unhinged, which surprisingly hurt his opportunities for promotion. After the revolution he was sent with General Semanov to take control of the far flung Asiatic territories of the former Russian Empire. Backed by Japan he was given a chunk of land where he began to brutally repress his villagers. On top of these regular outbursts of lunacy he and Semanov hated the Blosheviks AND the White Russians, they were at war with both sides of the freakin' civil war! So pissed off that the world is moving forward to quickly he separates form Semanov and becomes a regional warlord, deciding that monarchies are the only thing that will save humanity from itself. He begins planning a restoration of the Qing Dynasty that will unite all of East Asia, to enact this plan he surrounds the Mongolian capital and at night lights a number of fires to convince the Chinese occupiers that the force is much larger than it appears. The following day he takes the city after a protracted and bloody fight. So today on March 13th he declared Mongolia independent, and named himself dictator. He led a reign of terror with his army that lasted all the way to August, when the Red Army, sick to death of his bullshit, captured and executed him by firing squad, bringing the number of people on Chris' list of "People the Soviets killed who deserved it" to one.

In 1925, oh fuck yeah, the Scopes Monkey Trial begins. We all went to high school, and we all read Inherit the Wind, the only difference between you and me is probably that I loved the whole thing and own the original film version plus the newer Hallmark series version. I also own numerous biographies of Clarence Darrow, on whom the character of Charles Drummond is based.

1930, stupid ass Pluto is discovered. Stupid stupid freezing space rock.

1943, Germany eliminates the Jewish ghetto of Krakow. There is nothing funny to say about it. I once met a man who was at Krakow and was then sent to Auschwitz, he was the one of the nicest people I ever met.

In 1962 Lyman Lemnitzer, chairman to the Joint Chief's of Staff for JFK offers up a nifty little plan called Operation Northwood. His awesome plan is to stage a fake terrorist attack on Gitmo which will give us a cassus belli to attack Cuba. JFK throws him from a window and includes a classic Kennedy one liner "Fuck off and die."

2003, in France scientists report that 350,000 year old human footprints have been found in Italy, science again subtly says "fuck along now" to New Earth Christians.

Visit katebeaton.com

Galaxy Trucker, a cruel game in cruel space...

Recently my friend Owen brought a game 'round to the apartment. I had seen it on the website boardgamegeek a while ago and was intrigued. The name of this little gem is Galaxy Trucker...

To be perfectly honest I think I would be safer in that than in any ship you make in this game. Don't get me wrong however, the game is a blast. The idea behind Galaxy Trucker is that you are a "Truck" driver, who is braving the harsh mistress called space in hopes of earning a few pennies for yourself, either for a drinking habit your character would be sure to develop or perhaps your child has a disease. A space disease. The game takes three rounds, which grow progressively more difficult the further you get. Each round opens with you and a tile card with an outline of a ship on it, a small ship for level 1, medium for 2 and two different types of level 3 ships (one being a rough outline of the starship Enterprise). You then race against the other players to build your ship from tile pieces in the game lid. These pieces are square and have a number of different purposes, some are shields, others engines and lasers and the like. The tricky part is that they have different types of corridors connecting them, and you need the right kind of corridor to match it to or else it doesn't connect. Likewise you can get penalized for having open corridors leading off into space. Now once you've completed your spacecraft, to the best of your ability, you grab a token representing your place on the board.



The horrors commence once you lift off. Once in space you have a deck of cards for each round, when you draw a card you must fulfill whatever dark lovecraftian prophecy it demands. Sometimes you flip a card and discover a planet that wishes to trade some valuable junk that can be sold later down the lane, or maybe there's a derelict spaceship floating around that can be crewed and brought home. That ship is derelict for a damn reason, space trucking is the equivalent of flying fighter planes in World War 1, after five successful flights your a national hero, otherwise your fucking dead! So lets say you don't get a fun card like the ones I mentioned you get Space Pirates, Smugglers or Slavers, hell a meteor shower even comes along. If you're first in line (you finished your ship first) you deal with it first. If you don't have enough lasers to drive it off or kill it you get smacked around, bad. Now if you have shields you can bear the brunt of the pirate or slavers attack until such time as they move on, to the next player, and the player after that. However shields and certain lasers require batteries to be used to power them, so if you run out of gas (a likelihood as you can't refill during a round) you get hammered by the attacks, or lose precious crew to insidious rapscallions. This is where Galaxy Trucker gets really brutal. In round three, after barely surviving the first rounds I design my Enterprise, it doesn't have all the guns in the world or all the engines, but it does have a pretty good showing of batteries. Well there are certain cards where "combat" occurs, where your ships are matched against each other and the loser of each of the categories suffers some grisly fate. Well when you lose both the laser and engine challenge not even shields will save you when all your batteries are depleted. You rolled for hits to your ship coming from different directions. Most things can be blocked by shields, but shields need energy, so when you run out anything can be a game ending disaster. I was struck by a stray asteroid after I'd run out gas, right in the neck of my ship, scissoring it in half. You could easily imagine the crew (most of which were in the lost half) struggling to the windows, watching as the saucer drifted away without them, then the air runs out. I lost 70% of my crew in a single hit. As I drifted further I encountered pirates who obliterated my cargo holds, then finally a slaver showed up and took my captain for Snoo Snoo. This was literally the first four cards into the last round. Well it didn't turn out that bad for everyone else after I died, after those tragedies it was pretty much empty ships and open planets all the way to the end. That is the essence of this game, maybe something bad will happen in the vacuum, and everyone dies in less than thirty seconds, or maybe you make so much money you can retire and nurture your drinking habit. It all depends on your skills in building and your luck. i highly recommend this game for people with vivid Sci-Fi imaginations.





"Good news everyone, we're going to play Galaxy Truckers! In the Nebula of Melting Brains."