History! March 19!

Here I go again on my own, going down the only road I've ever known...history. Today will be fun because I can now make my own macros and I have a plentiful source of gifs to illustrate my point. History will now eat up bandwidth like motherfuckin' Far Cry 2 on ultra settings.


So today we start on March 19th 1279 AD...in MONGOLIA!

Wherein our brave yak herders defeat the depressing Song dynasty at the battle of Yamen. Nobody cared...except the Chinese.

In 1863 a Confederate cruiser Georgiana is sunk on her maiden voyage. In her hold is literally the economic future of the South. Valued at around $1,000,000 at the time the South throws up their hands and asks "What next?" (For those of you who want a clue the answer rhymes with 'Rickett's Barge')

1915, Pluto is photographed, but is still not acknowledged as a planet. Looking back a history post or two ago reveals the secret date that the Freemason's and Illuminati selected as the birth of their planet-not-planet's admittance date into the pantheon of shitty space debris larger than a football field.

1916 America launches its first ever air combat operation, the target, that crazy bitch Pancho Villa. Villa escapes and goes on to be remembered as a cool guy, primarily because he hung out (robbed) with white people every once in a while. The actual cool Mexican revolutionary is Zapata, and everyone should know it.

1918, the U.S. approves of time zones (makes sense) and daylight savings times (fuck you). It makes you wonder just how the hell you set your watch in the past.

1920, We reject the Treaty of Versailles again, because hey, maybe World War 1 was everyone's fault right? (The Treaty of Versailles being the document created by the victors of the war, stating in no uncertain terms that Germany was to be Europe's bitch for all eternity, and that every German male had to be kicked in the nuts at least once by a Frenchmen or he would buried alive in Verdun. Naturally when tempers cooled and Germany still had some hard feelings about the economic catastrophe such brutal reparations unleashed on them they started invading places...

Good job Triple Entente :(

In 1921, from what appears to be "This Day in WTF!?" some Italian fascists are riding a train through Slovenia and decide to shoot at some kids like they're Buffalo. Two are killed, two mangled, and three wounded, the local Indian tribe mourned because the Italians didn't use the whole body.

1931, gambling legalized in Nevada, intelligent few prefer to stay at home and flush their money down a toilet instead.

1941, the Tuskegee Airmen are activated. This being an all black unit in the air army corp.

In 1945 Hitler orders all industry, shops, military installations...pretty much everything you see when you look out a door to be demolished in light of the approaching allies.

OH SHIT! In 1965, the Georgiana (sunk earlier in this post) is rediscovered with its cargo intact and soggy. Modern estimates (a la 1965) puts the cargo at a worth of $50,000,000.

In 1978 the UN politely asks Israel to leave Lebanon and stop blowing up their shit. Israel complies and the UN sends a force to act as a human shield between Israel and its neighbor.

1979, C-SPAN is put on air! WOOOOO!!! For those of you who aren't in the "know" C-SPAN is basically a live feed of Washington D.C. and all the crusty old White People who work there. If you've ever wanted to see an inauguration or senate hearing and not have Fox News' pundits trying to tell you what to think go here. You'll also get to see full comments from Senators and Congress people instead of insta blurbs edited for dramatic effect.

1982 Argentina lands some troops on South Georgia Island, forcing England into war. Happy "Beginning of the Falklands War" everyone!

1987, Jerry Falwell, the ignorant fucker that he is, takes over the Christian organization PTL, after its former leader leaves due to...SHOCK! SURPRISE! a sex scandal.

2003, President George W. Bush (Or Dubya as the cool kids call him, I prefer Ass Goblin) tells the American public, that we will be invading the hell out Iraq. His reasons include...

1. Lies he made up

2. Lies Cheney made up

3. Lies the CIA made up

4. Lies Collin Powell was told to tell to the UN

5. "I just don't like 'em"

This will be the second time I've had to roll out Nicholas RAGE in a week.

In These Days of Evil Presidente...

I would rather like to see that one or two pay their due. I am speaking of course that at this juncture it has become pretty clear that the United States (since 9/11) has been under something akin to a dictatorship of the executive. I mean seriously how can you ignore it at this point, or wax complacent about "moving forward". When the executive of the U.S. and his associates actively work in collusion to remove opposition from the judicial branch, and the legislative is just a bunch of morons then we have a serious issue that needs serious repercussions. http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/03/us/politics/03legal.html

I mean for fucks sake the President was actively trying to claim the 1st amendment wasn't applicable to modern war efforts. Our constitution is our countries source of direction and trying to circumvent that to wield powers over the country seems a tad bit treasonous.

Now I am a big fan of Nixon getting forced out of office by Watergate, but in my opinion it didn't gor far enough, he needed to be put on trial like a regular criminal. After America let Nixon go and deigned to move forward we opened up the option of pushing the limits on government abuse of power, because what could you do that would get you arrested? Well, it looks as though the answer is anything. I know a bunch of people in this country want Bush and every other skull fucker responsible for the last eight years to get put away and charged for all of their evil, but they won't. Now naturally if you or I did any of these things, or plotted to do them in basements, wearing beards and quoting scripture from any other source besides the bible we would be found and prosecuted. However since this man did it in broad daylight as our elected leader he gets a "get outta jail free" card. Think about it, are you pissed off? Yes, what are you gonna do about it, I wrote to my congressmen and senators, they said they wanted to move forward instead of looking back. Heh,heh. Well if I commit a crime now and no one knows until I'm 80 and everyone involved is dead, I still get tried and could go to jail, so I think that it's only fair that someone who commited crimes up to four weeks ago should, I don't know, GO TO FUCKING PRISON! So now what? I've done my civic part, but it didn't matter because even if we all wrote in and complained the government doesn't give a shit, because it's not as though we would actually rise up and slay them for being pricks. What the hell do we have to do as a nation to say, well, in spite of our learned friends from the deep south the rest of the country would like to make sure the terrorists don't win, by trying the dudes who are responsible for making us live in abject fear.

Also, none of that well in this country the first amendment allows you to say that, which is better than some other countries. FUCK YOU! The "Prez" tried to fucking abolish it, the fucker tried to get rid of it you assholes! If you don't actually hold the government responsible for their activities you are complacent in the crimes just as much as they are. Rush Limbaugh, die in a fire.